Purple Butterfly

when reality is black part 2

Friday, March 18, 2005

So, ok! ok! I won't exactly call my lovelife to be a fairytale. In fact, I am waiting for my prince charming to rescue me. While I am on the wait I do not want to to feel desperate but to at least make myself distracted from the occasional pangs of loneliness being single can bring. again, the same friend emailed this to me to prove her point. I understand that at this point in time I have nothing to hold on to. It'll only pain me the more when my heart longs to be with the boy, it seems pointless to be hoping for a hopeless situation but nonetheless, the sun continues to shine. Read on, and again, I have no idea who exactly wrote this piece. I certainly do no agree to all of it but it's worth pondering on.

UNREQUITED LOVE:

When we fall in love, we fall real hard. We do anything to win our loved one's heart. We accept the pain and smile even though we're dying inside. We wish, we hope, we long, we wait. But sometimes the wait it too long that we begin to wonder if our time is worth the wait, or if there's really something to wait for to begin with. And then it hits us.

While the braver and luckier ones have their whole lives to spend with the ones they truly love, there are those whose relationships that once worked out well just fail. And unfortunate as that may sound, they are still to be considered lucky, for while their relationships have turned sour, at least they were able to feel it, to be in it. Even more unfortunate are those who wait, wait, wait, and wait, yet their stories never start.

These people end up wondering what could have been had they done the other choice, and then they start asking, in the first place, what was the other choice that could equally make them happy? Was there any, really?

Sometimes, things are just exactly the way it seems. There's nothing more than his/her glowing eyes staring at you, there's nothing more than his/her hand holding you, there's nothing more than his/her hug giving you comfort, there's nothing more than his/her sweet words consoling you. Really, there's nothing greater than friendship that s/he can offer.

Yet you decide to go on believing that a miracle will happen. You decide to daydream until your face can no longer hold your plastered smile, then you snap back to the real world and as if you were back to step one, you can hardly accept the truth. You cannot gracefully admit that s/he's not yours, and may never be. You insist that you have chemistry. You firmly believe that you can only feel that strongly for him/her and just the same, s/he will never find a greater relationship with anyone but you.

But sometimes, fate can be harsh. So many people have said it's a matter of our choice. So many people have claimed that we can reverse our fate. But hasn't it also been evident that it's not always the case? Hasn't it been proven that sometimes, we have no choice, or rather, what we have are unrealistic choices?

We do not really have to argue with the fact that sometimes, no matter how much you try to make things happen, no matter how many chances you try to grab, no matter how much you try to win, things will not be the way you want them to. Not because you are wrong for wishing, hoping, longing and waiting, but because in reality, it's only you making the story, trying to end it happily. In reality, you're the only one playing the game, hoping s/he would join someday.
And in reality, there was never really someone else in your life, but your own mind playing a prank you have yet to accept.

Butterfly Tales
2:39 AM

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