Purple Butterfly

Monday, September 05, 2005

To blog or not to blog? that is the question. That was indeed my question when I started this blog. I was a lot hesistant at first cause I didn't want to go public with my thoughts and emotions for fear of being misjudged and ridiculed. Time and again, I have mentioned that I am a private person and I keep things to myself or share them with people I trust and I feel comfortable with. Or, maybe I just feel private but I know that I have shared a lot about my life to a considerable number of people. I finally decided to make one with the goal that maybe 'other' people will learn from my experiences. Then, I found the knack of writing and updating my blog from time to time. It gave me an outlet to pour out my emotion when nobody is listening and when everybody seems to be concerned about their own lives. Then I found blogging as a way to connect to those around me and those who are away from me. I have been living away from home that it seems tiresome to be writing individual emails to my friends and my family just to update them about what's going on with my life. Blogging has also helped me keep in touch with friends that are precious to me but have somehow left to different places or friends I have left behind my hometown. Plus, blogging helps me develop writing. One thing to consider in blogging is that il involves writing. Until finally, my reason for blogging boils to only ONE and that reason is for me to remember. To remember the events that are significant for me no matter how insignificant it may seem to other people. I want to remember as much as I can about my life whether I am here working or at home with my family. I want my future family, my future husband, my children and their children to read how my life was, maybe to learn, to unlearn certain lessons I went through. I used to care on how my blog looks like to please my 'readers' (ha! assuming me!!!) until my bestfriend ROX updated my template that perfectly describes me, it is lavender with clouds, friends and butterflies... Now, I am not changing templates no matter how boring it can be in the years to come. But maybe I'll consider making a template, the restrictions in our company hasnt given that freedom to experiment in making templates. Bottom line is, this BLOG is for me, it is a gift to myself. I hope someday when I read my entries, I would laugh and cry remembering those times, events and people who have touched my life. I am but a grain of sand among millions of others who want to be heard, who wants to be acknowledged and valued. It's no longer important to me if I am ridiculed or not, what matters to me is not that I am 'just' among the millions but the fact that the millions will still not be complete without me.

Butterfly Tales
3:43 AM

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