That's me and my sup GNET from one of our team outings. It was a blue day that day. For the past 2 months we have tried several ways to shed off some gooey fat from our stummies, to our hips, butt and thighs due to the food binges we are almost always guilty of. We worked our way through Tae Bo and aerobics sessions every week. It was great having a Tae Bo buddy who would stick with me rain or shine. It was even taxing on our part because of our shift 12AM-9AM, we sleep at around 11AM-1PM, wake up by 4PM-5PM to be on time for Aerobics and Tae bo by 5:30PM. It also became an outlet where we can just vent out our frustrations through kicks and punches and laughing our hearts out for trying out so hard to perfect every move. It even gave us time to talk about personal stuff like her bubbly lovelife while mine is non-existent. It was worth waking up for, having to commute and trying to sleep again by 8PM so that we'll wake up refreshed for our shift. Lately, we have changed our routine, instead of having to commute, pay for fare and entrance fee, GNET had an idea of just working out in her house. She has a tape on belly dancing, we can play badminton, or just use the treadmill. She reasons out that she is trying to save enough money for rainy days. She had a point so she invited me over to stay at her house this week. I am not used to sleep overs and sleeping on beds other than my own or hanging out in houses other than my own. I was brought up by my parents to never sleep over in other houses unless I needed to. It was ok for my friends to sleep over at my house anytime as long as I am at home with mi mama and mi papa. GNET and I shares the same upbrining. She and I are unica ijas and both middle child. Compared to her, she has a more pampered life. Our age gap is only a year so it's so difficult reaching out to each other. Just imagine the concern of my mom when I texted her that I have been staying at my direct supervisors house. Her being my sup and me being her agent did not affect the bond that we have shared lately either at work or outside of it. I can safely call that bond as friendship. It is a known fact rather that I am not the only person that my sup has invited to her house. She has adopted a lot of her friends inside their home. They come and go anytime they please and her family has enjoyed their company in the many years now. I miss the atmosphere of home, of family, of brothers and maids. My stay at GNETs has provided me all those comfort that I have longed for for the past months. Although the feeling is not entirely homey and comfortable but it feels great to be in a home once a while even is it's not my own. I love my own home of course but it takes a boat ride away compared to GNETs which is only 2 jeepney rides away from where I am currently renting. I love the place where I am at but sometimes it feels good to be in a home once in awhile. Did I just repeat myself? hehehe Growing up, I never had a sister, obviously and not even a close female cousin that I can bond with. Being friends with GNET also gave me the feel of what its like to have a sister around. I have many thanks to two of my bestfriends and girlfriends in between who somehow filled in the shoes of being a sis to me back in highschool and in college. Roxelle was like a sis to me back in highschool, Gaaad, we were classmates and neighbors at the same time until she had to transfer to CEBU and DAVAO after 2 years in SHJMS. I was technically 'bestfriendless' for 4 years until I met Alma when I was already in second year college majoring in BIO at XU. We were classmates in almost every subject and what I loved about alma was that even though cheating was so rampant those days, we never used each other as cheatmates. We both worked hard, studied and shared notes and leakages. We always cheered each other up when the going got so tough in school and our so-called lovelife. duh! Makes me wanna puke remembering those times crying over our exes. My GAAAAD! hahaha She's in Manila and how I miss her company. God has been so good to me that he always sends someone in my path to be my friend and sister. And though words of love are unspoken at times but the feeling and the atmosphere is evident.

I have been wanting to quit my job but I ain't a quitter. I just feel that way whenever I feel pressured, lonely, or depressed over certain situations. It's not that I don't want change or that I fear change, heck I didn't even fear uprooting myself from my comfort zone in just 2 weeks. I enjoy the freedom that I have and it scares me sometimes that I have the power to abuse it. This freedom that I have is a privilege and I am making the most out of it. In time, I will find a new a job, a much better career, and one that can sustain me and my family whom I love and miss so much.

Have I ever mentioned that I am so proud of both my boys? I mean my brothers. My kuya Paolo and my Kaloi. My kuya is becoming the most admirable guy could ever be. He is making a name for himself, he is honest and hardworking. I didn't think that he was serious when he announced one day that he was gonna run for mayor in the future. It does help that our family or should I say our family name FORTICH comes from a long list of public officials dating way back during the spanish period in the PHILS, particularly in BUKIDNON. I am sure that my kuya isn't just one of those who dream of becoming mayor to please his relatives or friends and not even for the sole purpose of becoming popular or taking advantage of our lineage. In highschool and in college he was just any average joe. But what sets him apart is his pure heart, his kindness, his gentleness, his meekness as a gift rather than a weakness, his pleasant company and just about everything about him makes up a great leader that our city needs. Let me also take the time to talk about or brag about my lil brother kaloi. HE is the silent one in the family. An artist by heart and in time, by profession. It didn't take long for me to realize just how good he is when he works with his hands. I remember when he can stay up all night with legos around him, building every ship, creature and every imaginable machine. I began to notice that he can draw incredibly when he started to fill his notebooks with cartoons. He rarely took notes in class and drew all the time. He looks at life in silence and in beauty. He is color-blind by the way and considers it a challenge rather than a handicap. There is more to my brother than just his passion for art. This bro of mine, though many times silent and who seem to have a world of his own is a source of wisdom. Like what they say 'silent waters run deep.' He thinks deep and think hard, I rarely see him cry and when I do, it just breaks my heart to pieces. The times that my brothers smile and laugh are those times that I enjoy the most with them. I am getting emotional, and just goes to show what I have been missing and missing out. My mom fills me in with stories of my brothers whenever I call home but it's not the same as being with them and sharing my life with them. They are the men in my life in addition with mi papa that I can love completely and wholeheartedly without reservations and without fear of not being loved in return. I have grown up and a lot has changed not just for me but for my brothers, mi mama and mi papa. One thing will always be the same no matter which road this life will take us, and that will be the blood that runs through our veins and the love that keeps our family close despite distance and despite time.